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The Scars of Sexual Abuse

Updated: Oct 24, 2022

Sexual abuse leaves scars often no one can see. Hidden beneath the ‘I’m okay’ or ‘I’m fine thanks’ with that smile people around you have become so used to seeing, hides deeply rooted suffering and pain.

Sexual abuse can happen to anyone, any gender and at any age.


No matter how many times you have questioned yourself and no matter what anyone has said to you, YOU DID NOTHING WRONG!!!

You survived the event, the abuse, the rape, the moment your life changed forever, what now?

Well firstly it’s important to do what ever feels right for you. The experiences maybe similar but how a person processes trauma is very personal and unique. By only doing what feels right for you, when it feels right, your healing journey can begin in a healthy way.

Secondly it’s important to surround yourself with people you trust, people that can offer the support you need and help create a safe space for you to heal.

No you don’t need to answer anyones questions!

Nor do you need to share anything you don’t want to!

These people are there to create a loving, safe bubble around you, so you can heal and share when ever you want without questions!

Lay down the rules clearly with them if you need to, perhaps say ‘I understand you want to help me, you can do this by…..’.

You could consider a checklist for what you need in a support person around you, this may prove helpful in picking the right people to have around you at this time.

Thirdly take everything one step at a time. Did you know it’s common to suddenly not remember how to do things you always knew how to do. That’s okay, this is part of your healing. When the time is right you will know how to do these things again.

By taking everything one step at a time and only focusing on the present moment it helps you regain control and confidence in your own life.

Fourthly process every single emotion you feel when you feel it. Every feeling is really okay, no matter what that feeling may be it’s normal, it’s natural and it matters.

Very often people feel a huge mix of emotions, some of which could be guilt, fear, anger, sadness, embarrassment or shock. Every single one is normal, healthy and important.

When you experience these emotions find healthy outlets.

If you are angry perhaps go scream and shout in a room alone or in a big open space.

If you are sad let those tears flow, let them flood out, trickle out however they come just let them go.

Healthy outlets for these feelings are very important. It helps get it out rather than it eating you up inside.

Fifthly be kind to yourself. If you are not ready to do something, that’s okay. Every single day no matter what, be kind to yourself. You have got through such a horrific event, you deserve every bit of love and kindness out there!

Perhaps each day allocate some time doing something that makes you happy.

Remember to celebrate every milestone, every achievement big and small. By acknowledging your achievements it can help boost your mood and encourage you to keep moving forward.

Did you know meditation can be helpful at creating a safe space within your mind to allow you to relax and support your well being.

Even just a few minutes a day or a week could make such a difference.

Did you know there are different kinds of therapy and support out there, so it’s important to find one that works for you. It’s also important to find a therapist you trust, most therapists offer a complimentary consultation so maybe ring a few, they won’t mind.

Analytical Hypnotherapy with Psychotherapy is a very in depth therapy which gets to the root of the problem. The therapy is client led so you remain in full control at all times which following a trauma like sexual abuse can be reassuring.

Our minds are very clever things and by connecting with the inner mind a therapist is able to get to the issue without the thinking mind taking over. It’s all to easy to justify things or change a response when questioned to what you think is right but by removing this from the equation while in a relaxed trance type state like hypnosis it allows the problem to be address throughly, almost like removing a weed from the very root rather than just the surface.

It takes time, therapy, support and love but when the times right your experience will become a chapter in your book.

Please know you are not alone! I hear you, I understand and I can relate.

Head to my website to find out more about the therapy I offer and how I can help you👇

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